I just made a deep thought lastnight when my friend texted me that she was pregnant and that she's getting married. I suddenly felt a rush of envy thinking why so soon when I, myself wished that I would settle down the soonest. Then thoughts came to my mind, "why?"....Was I born unlucky? I'm not blessed with beauty and brains, I'm not blessed with good physical features such as height and figure. I'm not rich, I can't get anything I want, I've been unlucky in love (except for my present), I'm not bonded that much to my family and most especially I can't bear a child as of now. I mean, were all of these been done on purpose? Why was I experiencing this? I just felt I haven't accomplished something in my whole life. All I brought was disapointment. I haven't made anyone that happy and proud. It's not that I'm not contented of what I have in my life now, it's just that why am I always left behind? I'm not competing with anybody. Somehow I just want that as life pass by, I'm with them on the way.
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