I just made a deep thought lastnight when my friend texted me that she was pregnant and that she's getting married. I suddenly felt a rush of envy thinking why so soon when I, myself wished that I would settle down the soonest. Then thoughts came to my mind, "why?"....Was I born unlucky? I'm not blessed with beauty and brains, I'm not blessed with good physical features such as height and figure. I'm not rich, I can't get anything I want, I've been unlucky in love (except for my present), I'm not bonded that much to my family and most especially I can't bear a child as of now. I mean, were all of these been done on purpose? Why was I experiencing this? I just felt I haven't accomplished something in my whole life. All I brought was disapointment. I haven't made anyone that happy and proud. It's not that I'm not contented of what I have in my life now, it's just that why am I always left behind? I'm not competing with anybody. Somehow I just want that as life pass by, I'm with them on the way.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
Leaving on a....new career...
Joie is leaving. as in resigning!!! she'll study medicine. i felt bad. i know we have to move on to a new career but the point of adjusting to a new emvironment seems hard. Weng already told me not to resign. but since she was the one who got me to Ventus, it's a gratitude. but how i wish HR will remain a team and a group. Ellie has gone to Training already. she's not part of HR anymore. it felt sa bad. who will be the next recruitment and who will be the next payroll?
Holy Vacation
I spent my holy week at Capiz, home of my future in-laws :)....days before that I was getting excited that I already packed my stuff, all complete in my newly bought travelling bag (from SM 3-day sale). I finished my reports for payroll just before Holy Thursday. Was i that really exited?!
That night, fart! can't sleep, hehehe how i wish it's morning already. i just can't help myself feeling excited, felt like something was burning my ass. I got my dad give me a ride to the terminal the following day where Jet and his cute cousin was waiting for me. speaking of cute, he's just cute. speaking of age, he's way tooo young than my brother. but he's tall. then we waited for his sister and niece then we rode a bus to Capiz!!!
I was so delighted when I saw Jet's dad, my future dad-in-law to be exact and when i got there, i immediately ran to the beach, just a couple of walks from their house. it's my favorite tambayan. They told me to treat the house like my own house and i was like, am i family? hehehe. I kept reminding myself that "Val, you are still the girlfriend, not the wife!!! Stop pretending as if..." it's one happy family inspite of the tragic death of one member of the family.
then everything just turned upside down when i met the wife of Jet's brother that happened to be the sister of his ex!!!! felt like i'm gonna be sick the whole vacation. i just noticed that she doesn't bond with the family. she's like, when she visits the house, she'll just sit in one corner. Jet never even introduced me to her. actually i've been introduced to all of his bros and sis in-laws but never to her. and i just felt like i've been covered by the world when i learned that his ex returned home from taiwan, and she just standing infront of us in the church after the procession!!!!! pakshiyet!!!! that bitch!!!! i was like going to scream!!!! my chest felt so heavy... i was getting paranoid thinking what if Jet will go back to her? what if that girl tries to steal him back from me? and to the fact that they are now in-laws!!!! coz his brother married her freakin sister! and also to the fact that she has the same name and nickname as Jet's sister!! i felt like i'm going to puke everytime i mention the "name" when i call his sister. but just to enlighten a bit, Jet just stayed with me all week. he stayed sweet and passionate that in just kept loving him.
one funny thing i just learned from the freakin sisters, Jet's sibs are not close to them. that's one ganda points for me. coz they're like, tattlers. bad mouth type of people. Jet's sibs are more closer to me. how i just love that. i love his family to be honest. just when we got back to the city, i was in tears. i miss them, i miss the place, i miss the whole days with Jet. how i really wanted to get married na. but his brother just died. it can't be celebrated in the same year as beliefs would say. well i'm still be going back.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Not My Day...
not really my day. I just damaged our office printer, wahahahaha... It just ate a ribbon and it got jammed. now we're connected to IT printer downstairs and we're like going up and down the strairs!!! But i didn't mean it. it was an accident. but i felt bad about it. i pity my friends going up and down the stairs not to mention our Manager, hehehe.
anyways, Jet went back to his hometown. tomorrow's the burial of his brother. I would have gone with him but I'm too busy and there's no time.
I'm a lil upset this past days. we have no internet. no surfing, no access to any business online trackers and no YM...it was soooooo boring. now it was restored but only a few selected websites that are in use. i'm dependent on yahoo music. i'm getting deaf here if i can't listen to music.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Tactless...
Fart! i am soooo tactless, imagine, we just fisished having a meeting and i was incharge of taking the minutes. there's this discussion about going on a night shift for payroll. as discussed by the group, we will hire another payroll staff. but we agreed not to. instead just be on an early shift. i was able to write that on my draftand was able to include it on the minutes till i emailed it to the whole HR team. just then our manager emailed my supervisor about the matter of hiring another staff and it sounds a lil not so good...god, did i just victimized my supervisor? shame....
by the way, Jet and i made up...i'm happy.. i miss him...i'm going with him for the holy week.. its going to be a holllllllllyyyy week end....
by the way, Jet and i made up...i'm happy.. i miss him...i'm going with him for the holy week.. its going to be a holllllllllyyyy week end....
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Bad Day....
I had a bad day now. I had a fight with Jet and I really felt so bad. He didn't text me the whole day!!!!!.....i wanted to cry...then i emailed some employees regarding their tardiness and it seemk they're mad at it coz i let the whole site know they're late!!!! the hell, they claimed they're humiliated!!! it's not me fault they're late... i'm about to go home and i haven't gotten any text from Jet... i really wanted to cry...please please please let him text!!!!!
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